Wednesday, July 7, 2010
day 03 : something you have to forgive yourself for
There are a lot of things that I have done in my life that I regret, in some way, but I wouldn't want to go back and change any of them. I know if anything changed, I may not be where I am right now. And even though where I am right now has its' ups and downs, I wouldn't want to have it any other way.
One thing, however, that I regret more than anything, is the time that I let another person get between me and Cade. I don't think I ever mentioned it on this blog, but two years ago, for about 3 months, Cade and I weren't together. Things in our relationship were not at their best. He was not listening to me when I asked him to stop playing video games so much, and he was making me miserable. I barely spoke to him at all while I was away over the summer in Venezuela, and then I broke up with him when I got back. I started dating another guy, and I was happy, until we broke up. I am extremely lucky that Cade was willing to take me back after what happened. I do believe that it was a big wake up call for us, to see exactly how our lives would be without each other. I would have regretted it forever if I hadn't tried to make things right between us, and I remember what happened every single day.
I still feel guilty for what happened, but it makes me value our relationship so much more, to know how fragile it really is.